The Big Myth About Small Groups

You have probably heard before, “If you want to grow spiritually, get in a small group.”

This is a myth…a big myth.

This myth is propagated by another myth, “People grow better in circles not rows.”

Neither are true.

Yet, small groups are emphasized continually in churches as central to the spiritual growth of a believer.

Churches have weekends throughout the year where small groups are heavily promoted.

People sign up for groups, believing that by doing so they will grow spiritually.

However, people, thousands of people, get into groups, yet never grow.

And this is the big myth about small groups…they never grow.

Sitting in a circle with others does not produce spiritual growth.

The truth is small groups do not produce spiritual growth; the spiritual truths of grace produce spiritual growth.

We will look at this later.

How do I know small groups do not cause spiritual growth?

Because I was in small groups for years as a participant, and I was the Small Group Pastor of a large church.

The church where I was the Small Groups Pastor promoted small groups as the key to spiritual growth.

Goals were set for how many new groups were aimed at to be started for the ministry year.

Plans were created to funnel people into groups.

Statistics were kept about how many people were in small groups and how many new groups were started.

These statistics were presented to the elders of the church as a sign of spiritual growth among the members of the church.

The spiritual maturity of the church and spiritual health of the church was measured by how many people were in small groups.

The statistics were evidence the leaders of the church were successful at moving people into groups; therefore, the church was successful because of how many people were in groups.

Twice a year – in January and August – there was a big push to promote small groups.

People would sign up and get involved, believing that by doing so growth would happen.

As the Small Group Pastor, I would visit the groups consistently to get to know people.

While in the groups, it became evident that very little spiritual growth was happening, if any at all.

Those leading and participating in the groups had very little understanding of the gospel of grace, as seen in Romans, Galatians, Ephesians, Philippians, and Colossians.

They had very little knowledge of the big picture of the Bible and how small the parts of the Bible fit into the big picture.

They had very little understanding at what happened at the cross.

They had no understanding that the new testament is not about books but about the blood of Jesus shed for the full and eternal forgiveness of our sins.

They had no understanding that the old testament also was not about books but about the blood of animals continually sacrificed to cover the sins of people under the law of Moses.

They had no understanding of the differences between law and grace and how those differences impact how we apply the Bible to our lives.

Most had no understanding of their complete forgiveness of sins and righteousness in Christ.

Most had no understanding they were justified by grace through faith, therefore creating peace between themselves and God.

They had no idea that there was no condemnation from the law if they were in Christ.

If they knew Romans 8:1, it was extremely unlikely they had any knowledge of the meaning of the verse within its context…that the Ten Commandments is a ministry that brings death.

Some knew and believed that salvation was by grace through faith…but they had little understanding of what that meant.

If they did know some of the truths of the gospel of grace, it was watered down by the teaching of the necessity of spiritual groups and spiritual disciplines for one to grow spiritually.

The gospel was communicated very, very rarely.

As I sat in on the groups, I listened to people sitting in circles share their different opinions about the group’s topic, usually centered on the sermon from Sunday.

After visiting many groups, it became obvious that most of the people in the groups did not understand the gospel.

They had no idea about the good news of all God did for them freely in Christ, and that is received simply by faith.

They had no idea how to live daily in the fullness of what Christ did for them and who Christ is in them.

They had been taught to relate to God through a set of spiritual disciplines rather than spiritual truth.

They had been taught to relate to God through spiritual formulas rather than relating to God as “Abba, Father.”

Yet they were told over and over again that what produces spiritual growth is participating in a small group (and practicing spiritual disciplines).

I remember briefly mentioning a few of the truths of grace in one group I visited.

As soon as the group was over, one of the group members approached me saying, “I have never heard that before.”

He and I began to meet regularly, along with a few other men from the church.

I began teaching them the truths of the gospel of grace – all that God freely, fully, and forever did for them in Jesus.

We studied the old and new testaments in their biblical context.

We studied law and grace in their biblical context.

I showed them the differences between forgiveness before the cross (old testament of law) and after the cross (new testament of grace).

We studied the book of Galatians and parts of Ephesians, Romans, Colossians, and Philippians.

These men had been in groups for most of their Christian experience, yet when they began to understand the spiritual truths of grace – the cross, they began to grow.

One of the men, the one who I met at the small group, told me, “Brad, I was always told by the pastors of the church that if I wanted to grow spiritually, I needed to join a group. I heard that at church for years. So, I joined a group, several groups, but I never grew. For the first time in my life, I am growing. Thank you for teaching me about grace.”

In conversations with the other men, they told me a similar experience.

I had the opportunity at this church to teach a class of about 60 people, most who were in small groups or leaders of small groups.

I taught them the truths of Galatians…the truths of the gospel of grace…the truths of the Spirit-filled life, where we relate to God as our Father in grace not as our judge under law.

I taught through Ephesians and Colossians in other classes.

(Note: These exact teachings are available on my Podcast - Gracereach with Brad Robertson)

Over and over again, many people in the classes would tell me, “What you are teaching about grace, the new testament, and all that God has done for us on the cross is changing my life. Thank you.”

One man in his 80’s told me, “Brad, for the first time as a Christian I am growing. Thanks for teaching me the truths of grace.”

A woman in her 80’s told me the same thing.

These types of conversations were constant with people of all ages.

One man told me how his teenage daughter had been impacted by these teachings, and she was very active in the small group youth ministry at the church.

Sadly, most of the people being transformed by the gospel of grace had been in groups or led groups at this church and other churches for years yet experienced very little spiritual growth.

Only when they were taught the truths of the gospel of grace did they grow.

Their growth reminded me of what Paul wrote to Colossians about how understanding the spiritual truths of grace produced spiritual growth in people’s lives.

Paul wrote in Colossians 1:3-8,

“We always give thanks to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you, since we heard about your faith in Christ Jesus and the love that you have for all the saints. Your faith and love have arisen from the hope laid up for you in heaven, which you have heard about in the message of truth, the gospel that has come to you. Just as in the entire world this gospel is bearing fruit and growing, so it has also been bearing fruit and growing among you from the first day you heard it and understood the grace of God in truth. You learned the gospel from Epaphras, our dear fellow slave – a faithful minister of Christ on our behalf – who also told us of your love in the Spirit.”

Notice the spiritual growth that took place the first day these people in Colossae heard and understood the gospel – the truths of grace, all that God did for them in Jesus.

The first day they heard and understood the gospel of grace in its fullness, they placed their faith in Jesus and immediately began to grow in hope and love.

The spiritual seeds of the gospel of grace began to grow within them and produce fruit in their lives as Epaphras taught them more truths of the gospel of grace.

In these verses, we see that people all over the world began to grow spiritually as they heard and understood the spiritual truths of the gospel of grace.

What is the gospel of grace?

The gospel of grace is everything that God has freely, fully, and forever done for us in Jesus to eternally secure our forgiveness and righteousness, resulting in peace with God.

The gospel of grace is being set free from a law-based, works-based approach to relating to God and growing spiritually.

In this freedom, people relate to God as Abba, Father, knowing they are fully loved and forgiven by God and righteous before him.

They do not try to maintain forgiveness from God or maintain a righteous standing before God through spiritual disciplines and practices.

They are established in the gospel of grace and enjoy a relationship with him where they have no fear of being out of fellowship with God, because they know they have been brought close to God by the blood of Jesus.

They know that Jesus who loved them and gave his life for them now lives in them to guide them.

It is clear in the Bible that hearing and understanding the spiritual truths of grace is what produces spiritual growth.

We do see small groups in the Bible, but they were always used to teach spiritual truths to people.

In Bible times, believers didn’t have large auditoriums to gather in so they could be taught the truths of the gospel of grace, so they relied on small groups or home churches.

However, small groups or home churches were never the source of spiritual growth, spiritual truth was.

Can small groups be a good environment for people to grow spiritually?

Yes…but that growth must be produced by the spiritual truths of grace.

Can small groups be a place people can connect relationally?

Yes.

And life-change can happen through these relationships

But not everyone likes small group.

The day the Lead Elder of the church where I was the Small Group Pastor stepped down as the Lead Elder, he relinquished his role as the small group leader.

Personally, he did not enjoy small groups; however, small groups were required if someone was to serve as an elder of the church.

As a matter of fact, the first time he went to a small group, he turned around an went home when he got to the house where the small group was meeting.

He simply did not enjoy small groups.

There is nothing wrong with that.

Small groups are not for everyone.

I remember a conversation with two staff members who told me how much they dislike being in groups, yet they had to be in a group because group participation was required for all staff.

The reason for this requirement was this: how could the church promote the necessity of small groups for spiritual growth if the staff of the church was not in groups. Therefore, small group participation by the staff was mandatory.

For churches to make groups the key spiritual growth can cause great spiritual damage in people.

People feel guilty for not participating.

And if they do participate, there is no telling what they will hear in the groups.

The belief that small groups produce spiritual growth is a myth.

The belief that spiritual growth happens in circles and not rows is a myth.

Biblically, spiritual growth happens when people hear and understand the spiritual truths of grace…

…whether it is in circles or rows,

…whether it is in homes or large auditoriums,

…whether it is in small churches or mega churches.

So, if you have been told that the key to spiritual growth is sitting in a circle in a small group or home church, don’t believe the myth.

The source of spiritual growth is understanding the truths of grace.

Personally, I sat in groups for years and never grew.

Yet when I heard and understood the spiritual truths of grace, I immediately began to grow.

My mission in life is to help others understand the truths of the gospel of grace.

If you would like to learn more about all that God has done for you freely in Jesus, check out my website: Gracereach

There you will find teachings I have done in my blog, podcast, and YouTube Channel.

I have written several books that may be helpful as well.

My prayer for you is that you grow in grace…whether in a group, a circle, a row, or alone.